Anyone who has ever dieted or taken on any new activity or change has heard of willpower. It is defined in the Merriem Webster as “the ability to control yourself : strong determination that allows you to do something difficult (such as to lose weight or quit smoking).” What I want to know is this something that we all really have? Why do some people seem to have a stronger version of it than others? Is there a paid subscription to it that I am not aware of? An upgrade in the current Willpower Application 2.0 for 3.99 a month? If this is simply mind over matter, then my mind is fricken’ exhausted.
When I look back at all the times that I have tried to take on a new diet (yes, I have done just about all of them), I have, for the most part, miserably failed. Yet, I keep trying. Is that willpower? The determination to keep flogging myself?
I have been doing awesome for the last month or so; eating clean, getting out and exercising every day and getting decent sleep. I have cut out alcohol, dairy, grains and sugar. I spent a week detoxing and felt awful. Then I felt amazing and I decided that I wouldn’t trade in that motivation and amazing feeling for even one glass of wine. Yeah, that must be the ‘determination’ part of willpower. Well, how come when presented with a choice, that was all mine, to have a “beverage” instead of a sparking water, I went right ahead and made the wrong choice? No debating, no struggle. I opened my mouth to say “Perrier” and out came “vin rouge, s’il vous plait (red wine, please).” Something took over and the words came out. I mean, I could have taken them back, but then a little French devil popped up on my shoulder and told me, “One little glass of red won’t hurt, my chérie. Plus, it’s good for your heart, it seems.” Anyone that knows me though, knows that this is where the downward spiral begins. It doesn’t stop at a glass of wine. Next, it’s poor food choices, because we’ve already fucked up, so why not make it worthwhile? I began the night with a train ride to meet friends. I spent the 40 minute trip prepping myself and telling myself to stick to the water and try to choose the healthiest menu option. Wow, did that blow up. There was no peer pressure here (just to reassure the friends that I was out with). The battle is in my own head. Willpower didn’t get off at the right train stop with me this time.
We’ve all seen the commercials, the books, the stories on social media that show how people have overcome their sedentary unhealthy lifestyles to become models of health and fitness with just a little discipline and determination. Looks easy enough, right? We buy the book, we shovel ome money out for the meal plans because we are inspired. If they can do it, so can we! Easy peasy! Most of the time, it is not rocket science. East healthy + exercise = be fit and happy. So why, do some of us fall off the wagon so easily? Do I just have a block in my brain that stops the motivation after a certain point? Why do I keep sabotaging myself? I know what I have to do to be healthy, so why don’t I? In my case, it could be just pure mental exhaustion, busy life or maybe loneliness.
For some of us, It’s hard to do something like this on our own. The only thing that really keeps me motivated right now is the personal trainer that I have hired to kick my ass for me. For someone else, being surrounded by other sweaty people in a gym might be their motivation. For another, a little booty shaking in Zumba class might be what gets the heart pumping. We have to spend some time through trial and error to find what best suits us and keeps us going back for more.
We might screw it up and when we fall off the wagon and roll a mile away, we push that nasty little devil off our shoulder, bury it, and run our asses off to catch up with the wagon.
When I look back at all the times that I have tried to take on a new diet (yes, I have done just about all of them), I have, for the most part, miserably failed. Yet, I keep trying. Is that willpower? The determination to keep flogging myself?
I have been doing awesome for the last month or so; eating clean, getting out and exercising every day and getting decent sleep. I have cut out alcohol, dairy, grains and sugar. I spent a week detoxing and felt awful. Then I felt amazing and I decided that I wouldn’t trade in that motivation and amazing feeling for even one glass of wine. Yeah, that must be the ‘determination’ part of willpower. Well, how come when presented with a choice, that was all mine, to have a “beverage” instead of a sparking water, I went right ahead and made the wrong choice? No debating, no struggle. I opened my mouth to say “Perrier” and out came “vin rouge, s’il vous plait (red wine, please).” Something took over and the words came out. I mean, I could have taken them back, but then a little French devil popped up on my shoulder and told me, “One little glass of red won’t hurt, my chérie. Plus, it’s good for your heart, it seems.” Anyone that knows me though, knows that this is where the downward spiral begins. It doesn’t stop at a glass of wine. Next, it’s poor food choices, because we’ve already fucked up, so why not make it worthwhile? I began the night with a train ride to meet friends. I spent the 40 minute trip prepping myself and telling myself to stick to the water and try to choose the healthiest menu option. Wow, did that blow up. There was no peer pressure here (just to reassure the friends that I was out with). The battle is in my own head. Willpower didn’t get off at the right train stop with me this time.
We’ve all seen the commercials, the books, the stories on social media that show how people have overcome their sedentary unhealthy lifestyles to become models of health and fitness with just a little discipline and determination. Looks easy enough, right? We buy the book, we shovel ome money out for the meal plans because we are inspired. If they can do it, so can we! Easy peasy! Most of the time, it is not rocket science. East healthy + exercise = be fit and happy. So why, do some of us fall off the wagon so easily? Do I just have a block in my brain that stops the motivation after a certain point? Why do I keep sabotaging myself? I know what I have to do to be healthy, so why don’t I? In my case, it could be just pure mental exhaustion, busy life or maybe loneliness.
For some of us, It’s hard to do something like this on our own. The only thing that really keeps me motivated right now is the personal trainer that I have hired to kick my ass for me. For someone else, being surrounded by other sweaty people in a gym might be their motivation. For another, a little booty shaking in Zumba class might be what gets the heart pumping. We have to spend some time through trial and error to find what best suits us and keeps us going back for more.
We might screw it up and when we fall off the wagon and roll a mile away, we push that nasty little devil off our shoulder, bury it, and run our asses off to catch up with the wagon.